I got your Christmas gift right here...

So my wife sez to me...
"Will I be getting that nice necklace this year, dear?"

So I sez...
"Well it may not be the one you're hoping for, but it'll certainly go around your neck."
And then I added... "Say, how do you feel about rope?"

Oh, how we laughed and laughed!

But then, as our laughter faded away,
from somewhere in the desert,
a lone coyote began his mournful howl.

The end.