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Showing posts from September, 2008

News Flash

Intersection of Southern and the entrance to Banner Desert.
We were behind this accident early this afternoon. Everyone survived.
Back to you Chet.

Busy Friday

What I did today...


ARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!! Don't go on vacation when you have a personal war being waged against you!

Talk Like A Pirate Day

Arrrghhhhh ye scurvy wenches! If ye be a wonderin, the 19th day of every September is "Talk Like A Pirate Day". So curl yer forked tongue and speak like it ought to be spoken, less I see you ripped down yer vest, savvy? Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day to ye!!! Arrghhhhh!

Large Hardon Collider

The importance of two letters is significant, VERY significant. Earlier today I had asked someone if they heard how the "Large Hardon Collider" test went. My inquiry was kindly returned with an inquisitive, "Whats that? Two naked dudes with boners running intoeach other?"Gross. As taken a back as I was with the disturbing images that followed the comment (you know what I mean), I realize that some thing as small as the placement of two letters in a 19 letter name, can have a colossal impact on ones mind. The lesson here is to be wary, very wary.By the way the first test for the Large Hadron Collider were apparently successful and we have not all died in a black hole. Thats a bonus.

Inappropriate

I can not think of a more inappropriate name for rubber exam gloves.

Caption Game #1

Please use the comment section to come up with the best caption for this terrible photo.
Winner will receive an award.

Smells Like Burning

If anyone has misplaced their trailer, I found it burning on the side of the I-10.
Dang, I'm like a real reporter now!
Back to you Chet.

Bar Tips

There's more to it then tipping a glass and acting foolish. 1. If you owe someone money, always pay them back in a bar. Preferably during happy hour. 2. Always toast before doing a shot. 3. Whoever buys the shot gets the first chance to offer a toast. 4. Change your toast at least once a month. 5. Buying someone a drink is five times better than a handshake. 6. Buying a strange woman a drink is not really cool. Buying all her drinks is dumb. 7. Never borrow more than one cigarette from the same person in one night. 8. When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails. 9. Get the bartender's attention with eye contact and a smile. 10. Do not make eye contact with the bartender if you do not want a drink. 11. Unacceptable things to say after doing a shot: Great, now I'm going to get dr…